Startstopstartstopstartstopstartstopstartstopstartstop to infinity +1
That's what I feel like I do. No, it's not what I feel like I do, it is what I do. All the time. I get motivated, start "something" then get frustrated/hungry/agitated/younameit then stop. Why is it so hard to stick with something, anything? Well for me anyway.
I have talked about ALL the many things that bother me until I'm blue in the face with Seth. Is something really bothering me? I've been asking myself that for a while. Am I really happy? Am I upset with anyone? Am I just lazy? What the hell is wrong with me? Other than the one usual worry, money, I have I can't figure anything out.
I am starting to think I get dejected too easily. That maybe I put way too much pressure on myself & little slip ups for me I take as BIG slip ups, ultimately stopping me. Do I put too much pressure on myself? Do I expect too much from me? Why am I so hard on me? Do I need to be perfect everyday all the time? Does it have to do with my own self confidence? Do I not have enough confidence in myself? Where do you find confidence? I wish it was as easy as buying it from the store. Ultimately, I think deep down, that is my problem. It has nothing to do with anyone but me. Joy.
These are questions I have been asking myself lately. Maybe if I let up on me a little bit, then I would feel so pressured.....by me. Then maybe I could flow more or even better. Then I'd be less likely to startstopstartstopstartstop.
I don't know but it has me frustrated. I have that 5K this Sunday which I'm pretty sure I will be wunning (walk/running - I learned the term from Heather & Elysia, not sure where they got it from but that's what I will be doing). I feel like a failure because I probably won't be able to jog much, if at all. Because I had trouble with the training. Am I a failure? If I complete the 5K, no matter how I do it, doesn't that make me successful in some way? Just the fact that I did it? I don't know. Right now I see nothing positive in the whole situation I'm so frickin' frustrated with myself.
I will be reporting back, Sunday night, after I wun the 5K, to let you know if I feel any better or if my thoughts have changed. I'm hoping they do. I'm kinda hoping it starts me on a trend of good things. We will see....
Annoyedwithmself,
Elizabeth
grazingthroughlife@gmail.com
If you finish a 5K, you are not a failure. Even if you have to walk the entire thing. And we will be there, wunning it with you. Not everyone can say they did a 5K. You can do it! I have faith in you! And after Jeremy laps us all, he will be there cheering us on. Trust me...you will feel good about yourself after you finish, even if you do end up walking. Walking does not make you a failure.
ReplyDeleteI'm eating cheddar jalapeno-flavored Cheetos along with a diet Dr. Pepper right now. Not good at all. But I'm not going to beat myself up too much. I'm going to get a good long walk in with my girls and my dogs and I'm going to do better at dinner. I get better at being healthy each week, not each day.
ReplyDeleteEVERYONE feels this way. EVERYONE makes mistakes, takes a break (I took a year off from running & hate myself for it!), feels deflated,discouraged,etc. at some point. The ONLY difference between those people who reach goals and those who don't are those who never give up, ever.
ReplyDeleteGood Luck, Sunday! This will be the 5K to measure all of your future 5Ks against :)
Heather A: Thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteHeather H: Can I get some Cheetos, please?
Leah: Thank you for reassurance!! Next 5K? I don't know about that!