Goals & No, I'm not talking about Hockey

What do we consider a goal? Getting all the laundry done & put away? Paying all your bills on time? Running for one minute on the treadmill? Goals are different for all of us. We would never consider completing laundry or paying bills on time as goals, but if you think about it, they are. You started something, you finished it. You had a goal. Sometimes we reach our goals & feel accomplished. Sometimes we don't & we have to keep working.

Did you ever stop to think about all the little mini goals you have within the BIG ones? I imagine most people don't think about that. I never used to. When I sit and things about particular "things" in my life, there were little mini goals that I suppose I had in the back of my mind. I don't even think I thought of them as goals.

Way back in the very beginning of 2004 I was working for a lawyer & I had applied to the State of NJ to be a parole officer. I had gotten the call to be interviewed & went & they pretty much were going to hire me. When I had my home visit, the detectives told me to start running. I knew I was in deep doo doo. I had gained a lot of weight, I had shattered my ankle 3 years before & was told the damage was so bad I really shouldn't do any weight bearing activity at all. Nice. Well, I walked my booty into the local gym & said "I need some help. I'm going to be going to the State Trooper Academy in 2 months & need to lose some weight". So I got a trainer & then decided not to take the job for reasons irrelevant to my story.

It was so hard for me to walk into that gym. Obviously it looked like I need to be there. But I did it, over and over and over again. Every time it was hard for me to walk in. I was successful at establishing a regular workout schedule. I lifted weights & walked on the treadmill. I refused to do any other type of cardio or use anything but machines. I worked with that trainer for a while, but felt I wasn't getting anything out of it. Partly because of my eating habits & partly because there wasn't any variation to my workouts. My trainer didn't exactly push me. So I stopped with him and started doing things on my own. This is around when I started educating myself. I read a lot & got a couple of books.

Yes, this is long but there is a point. Stay with me.

One day, as I was alone, doing weights I received a compliment from a different trainer & the girl she was training. I was told I look great. Me???? Wow!!! Eventually I would see them often & would we'd chat. Well, then I started training with them. Ironically, the two of them have become very important to me. Who would have ever thought that something so simple as kind, positive words would mean so much to me? I usually refer to them as My Donna & My Amy. When I really think about it, I think they were my first friends in NJ that were MINE. They didn't come with another other package. They belonged to me and only me. :)

So as I worked out with Donna, she would change things up every time. Forcing me out of my comfort zone. I was doing all the things I didn't want to. Oddly, I liked it. I looked forward to doing cardio with Amy. We were like gym ambassadors, riding the exercise bikes to Dairy Queen. We said hi to everyone, we talked to everyone, we had such a great time. Notice I said I was riding the exercise bike? Yeah, eventually Donna got me on the cross trainer. The first time I did it, I don't think I could handle longer than 3 minutes but she pushed me to 7. She rode the cross trainer next to me the whole time. I did it, my heart was pounding out of my chest but I survived.

There are lots of details about my friendship with Amy that have played a huge part in my life. She was part of a lot of my mini goals. I will be forever thankful to her for that. While Amy & I don't ride the exercise bikes to Dairy Queen anymore, we still talk. I'm hoping to convince her to join the YMCA with me so we can resume riding....

My training with Donna was/is important. She pushed me. I tried so many new things. She's really the reason behind today's particular blog. One "thing" happened during a training season with Donna, Elysia & I. Elysia had become my new gym buddy. I'm also trying to convince her the YMCA is a good place to workout. Elysia & I worked out hard together whether it was with Donna or not. Elysia & I would do lots of cardio together, then we'd practice things in the gym that we had done with Donna. I would ask Donna to use free weights (notice not machines) & she'd work us out, full body training, with free weights. Well, Elysia & I had to do planks to strengthen our cores. A plank is where you are in push-up position & you hold it for a matter of time. Well the first time we did them I could see the blubber in my arms shaking because holding the position for more than 5 seconds was extremely hard. I couldn't take it. I got upset & had to fight the tears. I was done with the gym that day. Both Donna & Elysia had encouraging words for me.

Anyway, Elysia & I would practice planks together. One of us would count for the other. It's easier that way. I think we got up to holding the position for 30 seconds. Then one day Donna said we were doing planks on the stability ball. The ball under our feet, hands on the floor. We fell off every. single. time. But we kept practicing. We got so good we could then roll the ball in to our chests & then do a push-up. The more I read, the more we trained with Donna, the more we worked out I wanted to get to that next "thing" but I couldn't get there without succeeding in those little "things". Each time I could do something longer I achieved a small goal. I didn't look at it as a goal. I just wanted the big "thing". To me it was exciting. My body, our bodies are amazing machines & when I think about it, it fascinates me. We are capable of so much.

I train with Donna here & there. I stopped going to my old gym & don't get to workout with Elysia anymore either. I'm working on my own. So far, not so good. I haven't had any goals. But writing this helped me figure some out. I know I'm capable, I just have to put the work in. I want to get back, strength wise where I was. I need to rebuild a lot of the muscle I have lost. The YMCA is new, with new people & I have the fear of being made fun of. I know it's a dumb fear, but it's real to me. I know probably every other person feels the same way I do. I did it once before, I can do it again, but this time I have a lot more knowledge. I'd also want to run. I don't know why, but I feel like I need to. I have to do a lot of little "things", set some small goals & achieve them before I get there.

So I know what I want to do, what I need to do & how to get there. I'm going to write down my mini goals & hang them on my refrigerator. I think it's a good place to put reminders. I'm not going to set a date for each little goal. My life is a journey that has a lot of paths to take. As long as I move forward toward each goal that is an accomplishment all in itself.

Happily,

Elizabeth
grazingthroughlife@gmail.com