Get a Grip....

I wanted to put a bad word (asshole) in my title, but I didn't. Also, the asshole I am referring to is myself.

I had a rough day Friday. The short of it: On my way to my Triple Threat class, which I ended up not going to I grabbed my mail. I saw the distinctive envelopes from my bank signifying a problem with my checking account. Stuff bounced because of an error someone else made causing me to be out of money I don't have & that had already pre-budgeted because I'm so poor that's how life is for me. I had to come inside and figure out the exact problem. I did. Nothing I can do to fix it. I'm ass out. Needless to say, I coped & coped hard with some chips, dip & a bag of chips ahoy cookies.

That was pretty much my diet for 24 hours. Awesome, right? By Saturday afternoon I felt calm & had a talk with myself. None of it made me feel better. I just needed to do things my way at that time. It doesn't make it right or better. It's just what happened. Being on such a tight budget always weighs on my mind. Struggling to find a job weighs on me. Add to that that I have trouble sleeping at night because I re-think, over think, pre-think, you name it. I can't change the past, I can't control things people have said/may say/are saying, I can't control certain things in my life only how I react to them. I didn't do so well over the weekend. Maybe it was a reminder that I don't have to do that. I don't know. It was back on the WW wagon today though.

Speaking of WW, somehow my weight is down an even 2lbs for a total (from my re-start) of 10.5lbs. Granted, that doesn't mean I can have a bender like I did regularly, it just means I need to work harder at finding an alternative.

Today I took a Cardio Step class, after I started the C25k program again today. With the C25k I didn't go back to week 1, I started back at week 2. It was a struggle for me but it went better than I expected. After that I took Cardio Step class for an hour. It was much harder than Cardio Pump & Triple Threat. It was mostly a step class, learning a new routine with a little strength training incorporated. The other 2 classes concentrate on a larger amount of strength training. There was a lot of up & over the step, pivoting, ponies, grapevines, kicks, power moves, you name it. I spent a lot of time trying not to bust my ass too!!

I had a good workout today....so good I have been EXHAUSTED all day long. Unable to keep my eyes open, just want to sleep kind of workout. That's awesome!!! I'm sure some of my exhaustion has a little to do with my womanly time embarking upon me as well. As I get older, it really is beginning to take it's toll on me. Anyway.....

That's where I'm at: a bender, a loss & a good workout!

:)